Tag: single mom blog

I Smell A Cheating Husband…You?

Posted by Delaine - November 3, 2010 - Infidelity, Social Barriers & Change, Support & Girlfriends, Surviving
smell cheater husband affair1  I Smell A Cheating Husband…You?

This past weekend, a very close friend of mine, Darlene, phoned me in a tizzy. Out of the blue, she had been accused by a girlfriend of having an affair with her husband. And since I’d recently been accused of the same by a neighbor, she wanted help sorting through the drama. Now I believe…

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What Kind Of Man Wants ‘Serious’ With A Single Mom?

Posted by Delaine - June 16, 2010 - Dating & Sex, Fears & Challenges, Longing...and Learning, On being alone, Relationships, Single Moms
dating single mom men  What Kind Of Man Wants ‘Serious’ With A Single Mom?

So I broke up with someone last week – a single dad of two.   He’s the first man I’ve gone out with since divorcing that I contemplated getting serious with whatsoever.  But even though we got along brilliantly, even though he said he was crazy about me, one main thing deterred his interest: the fact that I…

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Unusual Bedroom Behavior: Signs A Spouse May Be Cheating

Posted by Delaine - March 14, 2010 - Infidelity, Surviving
cheating signs in bedroom  Unusual Bedroom Behavior: Signs A Spouse May Be Cheating

It was only in hindsight that Gail realized that signs of her husband’s cheating had been present for months: in the bedroom. “Out of blue, he kept trying a new sexual position,” said Gail.  “I thought maybe he’d seen it in a movie or something.  ‘C’mon,’ he’d say, ‘Just put these pillows under your hips, I know you’ll love it.’ …

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Legal Action Can Help Mold A Child-Like Ex Into A “Better Man”

Posted by Delaine - March 2, 2010 - Dealing with the ex, Legal Matters, Surviving
divorced dad immature  Legal Action Can Help Mold A Child-Like Ex Into A “Better Man”

Sometimes dealing with an ex can feel like you’re dealing with a child:  you give and give and give….you kindly explain the same thing over and over and over again …yet still they don’t ‘get it.’ And though it’s sad to say – and painful to have to do – sometimes we have to take legal action to…

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To Change Or Not To Change The LOCKS After Separating

Posted by Delaine - February 3, 2010 - Advice, Dealing with the ex, On being alone, Support & Girlfriends, Surviving
change locks door divorce 150x150  To Change Or Not To Change The LOCKS After Separating

Two months into his divorce, Mike returned home early from work one afternoon to a big surprise:  his ex-wife had let herself in and was standing in his living room.   “I needed to come by and pick up a few things,” she said casually.  “I tried calling you earlier.  Didn’t you get my message?  I didn’t think you’d mind…”…

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Improve Communication With Your Ex-Spouse (BONUS: Avoid Seeing His/Her Face)

Posted by Delaine - January 8, 2010 - Co-Parenting, Dealing with the ex, Parenting, Surviving, Trying to Get Along
impossible ex1  Improve Communication With Your Ex-Spouse (BONUS: Avoid Seeing His/Her Face)

This past week, a divorcing girlfriend told me about ’collaborative software’, something her divorce mediator had recommended. Her and her ex’s parenting schedules are hectic and becoming a source of contention because of miscommunication. Moreover, she’s at the point where she really doesn’t want to see his face or talk to him if she doesn’t…

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Nothing Says “Merry Christmas” Like A Divorce Voucher

Posted by Delaine - December 22, 2009 - Deciding to Stay or Go, Support & Girlfriends, Surviving
divorce voucher 150x150  Nothing Says “Merry Christmas” Like A Divorce Voucher

These days you name it and you can find it in gift certificate form – spa treatments, movies, furniture…  But what do you think of the idea of a ‘Divorce Voucher’ as a Christmas gift?’ A few weeks ago, a law firm in England named Lloyd Platt and Company began offering such vouchers as gifts for the…

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Worries Of A Divorcing Mom: Am I Doing ‘Enough’?

Posted by Delaine - December 10, 2009 - Children, Parenting, Single Moms, Surviving
worried divorced mom enough  Worries Of A Divorcing Mom: Am I Doing ‘Enough’?

Even when I was married, I sometimes worried that I wasn’t doing ‘enough’ for my kids: Should they be involved in more activities or less? Am I too strict or not strict enough? Am I doing, saying, showing my kids enough of whatever they need to feel loved and special? We only get one shot…

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You Can’t Rush Your Learning – Even If You’re Convinced You’re Ready

Posted by Delaine - December 3, 2009 - Advice, Grief/ Anger, Healing, Legal Matters, Phases/ Stages, Surviving
rush personal growth divorce2 300x300  You Can’t Rush Your Learning – Even If You’re Convinced You’re Ready

Over the past year, most of my divorcing friends have found new partners and seemingly established lovely new lives. And I’ve wondered: Why is it taking longer for me? I mean, I crawled and slashed my way out of Rock Bottom, diligently performed my internal housekeeping, and grew and stretched spiritually in so many positive…

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POWER: A Scary Reason Why Some Exes Bow Out On Time With Their Kids

Posted by Delaine - September 3, 2009 - Abuse, Children, Co-Parenting, Dealing with the ex, Parenting, Surviving, Trying to Get Along
ex abuse power  POWER: A Scary Reason Why Some Exes Bow Out On Time With Their Kids

Does this scenario rings any bells? Sue is the primary caregiver of her two children.  Her ex, Brian, is a part-time dad who pays child support and takes the kids every second weekend and one evening/week.  When they first got separated, Brian was very concerned about his limited access to the kids; he wanted them…

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My Top Three Turn-Offs About SOME Divorced Dads

Posted by Delaine - September 1, 2009 - Dating & Sex, From the Dating Trenches, Parenting, Single Dads, Single Moms
divorced dad turn off12  My Top Three Turn-Offs About SOME Divorced Dads

On the heels of my positive article called Seven Reasons Why I Like To Date Divorced Men, I now want to disclose the top three things that turn me off dating some divorced DADS. Please read that again – I said SOME divorced DADS. And no, this is not meant to undermine the positive stuff…

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Hire Me A Husband! Drawbacks to Living Alone

Posted by Delaine - July 23, 2009 - On being alone, Parenting, Single Moms
single mom mouse issue 150x150  Hire Me A Husband! Drawbacks to Living Alone

This here divorced mom is not squeamish.  Nor am I a girly girl or a princess-type.  But my stomach is still in my throat – this event took me off guard! I was talking on the phone and walking through the kitchen.  For whatever reason, my eyes were drawn to the burner on my stove.  Suddenly it…

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Sometimes It Sucks Being A Divorced Mom With No Family Support in Town

Posted by Delaine - July 22, 2009 - Parenting, Single Moms
Divorced mon no family support 203x300  Sometimes It Sucks Being A Divorced Mom With No Family Support in Town

I’ve put off and put off and put off writing this blog because I was worried about coming across as a whiner.  But as a good friend recently reminded me once again, I’m not SuperWoman.  And so I confess:  I sometimes find it really hard being a divorced mom with no family support here in town.…

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Getting Real: If You’re Secretly ‘Talking’ to Someone, Are You Cheating On Your Spouse?

Posted by Delaine - July 16, 2009 - Infidelity, Surviving
emotional affair11  Getting Real:  If You’re Secretly ‘Talking’ to Someone, Are You Cheating On Your Spouse?

Though there may be some exceptions to the rule, in my opinion, ’emotional affairs’ are the same, if not worse, than jumping in bed with someone else.  I’ve heard many justifications from people:  “But it’s not really cheating cause I haven’t had sex with her. ”  Or:  “We just have this connection, you know.  I can’t expect my…

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Divorced Mom Worries: Can I Properly Celebrate my Sons’ Passage into Manhood?

Posted by Delaine - July 8, 2009 - Co-Parenting, Parenting, Single Dads, Single Moms
dreamstime 6798953 150x150  Divorced Mom Worries: Can I Properly Celebrate my Sons’ Passage into Manhood?

I was sitting around the campfire with my kids and extended family when an ongoing conversation seized my attention: At first, I thought my older brother was organizing a “boys-only” camping trip and inviting my uncle along.    But I quickly learned there was a special mission behind this getaway:  he was planning to celebrate his eldest son’s passage into…

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New Relationship Consideration: Would You Have Another Baby?

Posted by Delaine - June 6, 2009 - Fears & Challenges, Relationships
divorced mom pregnant  New Relationship Consideration: Would You Have Another Baby?

I gave birth to three kids in three years and I can honestly say their early years were a blur to me; life was INSANE.  And since divorcing I’ve sworn I wouldn’t have another child.  “This body now belongs to ME,” I’ve joked with my girlfriends.  The other day, however, a girlfriend asked me, “Then…

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Loving…Without Attachment: A Prescription for Hurting Hearts?

Posted by Delaine - May 8, 2009 - Dating & Sex, Healing, Longing...and Learning, Wisdom Gained
love without attach 199x300  Loving…Without Attachment: A Prescription for Hurting Hearts?

Laughing. Making love. Holding. Pillow talking…   No, I’m not fantasizing about falling in love again.   I’m imagining what it would be like to experience a weekend of ‘love without attachment.’ 

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Would You Risk Everything For Another Shot at Love?

Posted by Delaine - April 9, 2009 - Dating & Sex, Longing...and Learning, Loving & Trusting, Relationships
6a010536f43000970c01156f160bf2970c 800wi  Would You Risk Everything For Another Shot at Love?

A girlfriend of mine says she’s fallen in love. She’s met him only three times – he lives thousands of miles away in the United States. She now talks of how she plans to move there at the end of the year: she’ll find a new job; move away from her family and friends. Her eyes…

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You’ve PROVEN You Don’t “Need” A Man – NOW what?

Posted by Delaine - March 26, 2009 - Fears & Challenges, Loving & Trusting, Relationships, Support & Girlfriends
black and white side cropped sm  You’ve PROVEN You Don’t “Need” A Man – NOW what?

“You’ve proven you don’t need a man, Delaine.”   My best friend Hali then put her wine glass down on the restaurant table and continued: “So when are you going to stop proving it and move BEYOND it?” I looked at her confused. “What are you talking about?” “You’ve done it Delaine.  You’ve shown everyone that you can…

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From Little Girl…to Wife…to Divorced Single Mom

Posted by Delaine - January 5, 2009 - Grief/ Anger, Phases/ Stages, Surviving
dee and cyndy cropped 3 fo  From Little Girl…to Wife…to Divorced Single Mom

 Out of the blue, my aunt emailed me this photo tonight.  I’m not posting it because I want you say I look cute.  I’m showing it because it made me burst out crying.     Look at how innocent I was.  My God, the face of an angel with hair so white.  I keep wondering what I was like back then…but I…

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