As I read through his lengthy profile on the dating site, I found myself laughing out loud.  It was written with such good humor that I assumed THIS line was too: 

“What I don’t like:

1) Women who date younger men in the hopes of hiding from the fact they are OLD.
2) Women who judge me cause I date younger women, cause well… let’s face it, I’m cool. LOL

But when I jokingly teased him about these statements, I found out he meant them seriously.   He wrote:

“We all know that women are a lot more mature than men so it’s no big deal for us to date younger.  But when you flip it, the only thing that’s going on is pathetic older women f***ing boys.  That’s sick!”

Now whoa!  That wasn’t just harsh, it was hostile.  And I wondered:  Do a lot of men (perhaps over age 35?) share his sentiments?  Where does this hostility coming from? And  most importantly, can men’s feelings be changed or at least softened?  Cause  I don’t think this social phenomena is going to disappear any time soon… (read more here)

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Since becoming single again this past year, I’ve been called a ‘Cougar’ - which I hate, and a MILF.  When I discovered MILF stood for “Mother I’d Like to F***”, I laughed.  Though some might find it offensive, I found it rather endearing:  I imagined these luscious, muscley young men looking at me with awe and innocence in their eyes.  How cute they wanted a ‘teacher.’  *grin. 

As my dating adventures continued, I crossed into “Young-Man Territory” a few times.  Mentally, I found these relationships very limited - we weren’t on the same page of life whatsoever.  But physically, mmmmm… that was another story.  Not only did they have stamina and the ‘look’ to keep me afire, they had a willingness to please, to learn, and become a better lover.

And then one day a question struck me:  Why do men have cute nicknames for women like MILF and we don’t have any for men?   Are we too polite?  Have we lost our sense of humor when it comes to sex?  Or is the title ‘boyfriend’ or ‘husband’ all we’re comfortable with?

I then began rethinking the word MILF - for some reason it was bugging me.  Digging deeper I realized it was because it made the man into the Hunter and the woman into the Prey.  And in my young man relationships, that was NOT the dynamic: THEY were the prey, and I was the HUNTRESS.

From that day forward I thus proclaimed a new honorary name for these delightful specimens of flesh: SMILF - Service Male I’d Like To F***.  It reverses the power scheme AND it sounds cute, kind of like an adorable little smurf.

But WAIT!  Hold your horses.  Not just ANY man can become a  SMILF; this is high-status stuff, something that must be earned.  Three primary criteria must be met:

1)  At LEAST one orgasm must go to the woman before him during every encounter

2) If any extra large ejaculation occurs on the woman’s part, he will change the sheets without fuss, and

3) NO SMALL PENISES ARE ALLOWED.

:)  God love you SMILFS.

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Last weekend, Carnival’s cruise ship, Elation, hit the mighty seas for what was branded as the first ever, “Cougar Cruise.”  Parting from San Diego, California and porting in Ensenada, Mexico, this three day adventure was marketed as a ‘’sexually charged’  trip of dancing, eating and partying for older women and younger men.  According to the trip’s sponsors, The Singles Travel Company and The Society of Single Professionals, the cruise sold out almost instantly AND they had to hire more staff because the phone was ringing off the hook.

Back in September, when news of this themed cruise hit cyberspace, comments flew all over the place – some expressing disgust and fuming at the double standard (had such a cruise been marketed for older men/younger women).  But there was no denying the playful and excited tone to the majority of other comments from women (and younger men).  (Read more here)

Other Articles:

Adventures On Vacation: Reconnecting With An Old Boyfriend & An Old Part Of Me

HUNG - A Well-Endowed Dad Gets Pimped Out

Do Men Belittle Each Other For Penis Size?

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When I first started dating after divorce, I felt like I’d arrived on another planet.  Not just cause I had no idea how to date again, but because it quickly became apparent that a new ‘phenomena’ had come to town since I’d last visited:  Young Men Seeking Older Women.  And oh yeah -  their holsters were full.

If you’re anything like I was back then, you may frown and tsk tsk at the mere thought of dating or even meeting with a younger man.   God knows I had “rules” – and lots of them.  After all, good, decent women of a ‘certain age’ should only good, stable men of a ‘certain age.’  Right? 

But combine hormonal surges with temptations and opportunities (and ok, maybe a couple of drinks), and low and behold my Old Rule Book got rewritten.  Not burnt – just revised, with a special-edition chapter on self-exploration with the Young Man Kind. (read more here)

Other Articles:

Do Women Need ‘Deeper’ Men?

Power: A Scary Reason Why Some Exes Bow Out On Time With Their Kids

Psych Yourself Up & Go Out Anyway!

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