Category: Infidelity

What's It REALLY Like to Have An Affair?

Posted by Delaine - April 11, 2015 - Advice, Grief/ Anger, Infidelity, Phases/ Stages, Relationships, Surviving
dating separated men problems challenges how to1 300x200  What

It was my deepest, darkest secret – something that nourished me, tortured me, yet ultimately tore my family apart:  After seven years of marriage, the birth of three kids, and weathering the emotional storm of my husband’s infidelity, I made the choice to have an affair. Now I’m not revealing this today as some kind of…

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The Cheater & His Self-Loathing

Posted by Delaine - March 22, 2014 - Healing, Infidelity, Surviving, Wisdom Gained
cheating man self hate loathing  The Cheater & His Self-Loathing

FROM THE ARCHIVES 2009 You my not see it.   But it’s there… deep within him. It is beyond his admission, beyond his self-awareness. But it’s there,  eating away at his soul… His self-loathing. He may seem all blissfully happy-in-love with her; look at that skip in his step. That skips says that he wants nothing…

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“The Secret Sex Life of a Single Mom”

Posted by Delaine - September 6, 2011 - Between the Sheets, Concerns & Fears, Cougars & Single Moms, Dating & Sex, From the Dating Trenches, Infidelity, Internet Dating, Longing...and Learning, On Writing My Book, Sexual Issues & Kinks, Social Barriers & Change, Strong Mind & Spirit, Women's Sexuality
secret life of a newly single mother delaine moore mars venus coach calgary 300x258  “The Secret Sex Life of a Single Mom”

So I’m knee-deep into the publishing process on my upcoming memoir, which is slated for release in Spring 2012. And my publisher, which is the feminist publisher Seal Press, has changed the title of it.  It’s now: The Secret Sex Life of a Single Mom. (gulp)….A little more in-your-face than its original title,  “A Woman’s…

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Never-Again Heart Break: It’ll NEVER Hurt So Bad Again

Posted by Delaine - May 30, 2011 - Grief/ Anger, Infidelity, Phases/ Stages, Wisdom Gained
never again heart break divorce delaine moore sm 300x263  Never-Again Heart Break: It’ll NEVER Hurt So Bad Again

I was thinking about ‘heart break’ this weekend.  Not because I’m sad or because I’ve recently been hurt by someone. Rather, it’s cause I made the peaceful realization that I will never again hurt in this life because of a man, as deeply as I did when I discovered my ex-husband was having an affair. I’m not saying I’ve built…

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Survival Mode: “Existing” Post Infidelity & Divorce

Posted by Delaine - January 19, 2011 - Grief/ Anger, Infidelity, Surviving
divorce grief wilderness pa  Survival Mode: “Existing” Post Infidelity & Divorce

“Hang tough Delaine – things are going to better.   You really are better without him…” Many, many times I heard these words from girlfriends when I found out my ex was cheating.  I knew they were right, that at some point things HAD to get better.  But while in the throes of my grief, those words felt…

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Anger & Mistrust of Men: Have Your Walls Become Your Prison?

Posted by Delaine - January 9, 2011 - Fears & Challenges, Grief/ Anger, Healing, Infidelity, Relationships, Wisdom Gained
divorced woman walls bitterness1  Anger & Mistrust of Men: Have Your Walls Become Your Prison?

Do you ever wonder if divorce and/or infidelity have ‘hardened’ you?  I don’t mean ‘hardened’ as in “made you stronger.”  I mean as in, “encased you in a shell of mistrust and bitterness towards the opposite sex.” Cause that’s what happened to me; I wasn’t even conscious of it at the time.  Truth is, to this day, I still sometimes struggle with…

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“TigerText”- A Way For Cheaters to Cover Their Tracks

Posted by Delaine - December 27, 2010 - Infidelity, Surviving
tiger text cheaters  “TigerText”- A Way For Cheaters to Cover Their Tracks

It’s something I bet Tiger Woods wished he’d had – and something everyone, including cheaters, can now take advantage of.  It’s called TigerText.  And it can kill embarassing text messages or ‘evidence’ – forever. Released in February 2010 by California start-up, X Sigma Partners, TigerText is an iPhone application that enables users to set a lifespan on messages…

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I Smell A Cheating Husband…You?

Posted by Delaine - November 3, 2010 - Infidelity, Social Barriers & Change, Support & Girlfriends, Surviving
smell cheater husband affair1  I Smell A Cheating Husband…You?

This past weekend, a very close friend of mine, Darlene, phoned me in a tizzy. Out of the blue, she had been accused by a girlfriend of having an affair with her husband. And since I’d recently been accused of the same by a neighbor, she wanted help sorting through the drama. Now I believe…

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When Women Wear Blinders to the Truth

Posted by Delaine - September 16, 2010 - Infidelity, Loving & Trusting, Relationships, Surviving
liar manipulator ex husband  When Women Wear Blinders to the Truth

Have you ever observed a woman sinking deeper and deeper into a bad relationship and know that it is not your job to intervene? What if this woman was with your ex-husband? Take Carrie as an example. The relationship she is currently involved in has ‘Destructive’ written all over it –  but either she’s too naïve…

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Advice to Those Betrayed: Stop Comparing Yourself To ‘HER’

Posted by Delaine - July 13, 2010 - Grief/ Anger, Infidelity, Support & Girlfriends
other woman mistress self esteem1  Advice to Those Betrayed: Stop Comparing Yourself To ‘HER’

Recently, I sat with my emotionally devastated friend Maddie who had just discovered her husband was having an affair.   Why?  When?  How?  Now what?  her brain raced to answer, as she felt her family dream falling to the ground in slow motion. But it didn’t take long for her to start doing what most of us women do when affairs…

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Unusual Bedroom Behavior: Signs A Spouse May Be Cheating

Posted by Delaine - March 14, 2010 - Infidelity, Surviving
cheating signs in bedroom  Unusual Bedroom Behavior: Signs A Spouse May Be Cheating

It was only in hindsight that Gail realized that signs of her husband’s cheating had been present for months: in the bedroom. “Out of blue, he kept trying a new sexual position,” said Gail.  “I thought maybe he’d seen it in a movie or something.  ‘C’mon,’ he’d say, ‘Just put these pillows under your hips, I know you’ll love it.’ …

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“I Grew Balls”: How One Wife Confronted The ‘Other Woman’ To Find The Truth

Posted by Delaine - March 9, 2010 - Deciding to Stay or Go, Infidelity, Support & Girlfriends, Surviving
divorced woman balls courage  “I Grew Balls”: How One Wife Confronted The ‘Other Woman’ To Find The Truth

It wasn’t until ’she’ phoned in the middle of the night that Pam became suspicious.  The woman was obviously drunk, her voice a string of slurs.  And when Pam asked, “Who is this?”, all she got heard was “(Giggles) Just a friend…(click).” The next day, Pam confronted her husband.  Completely taken off guard, he insisted they were “only friends.” …

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Serving It Up Cold To That Lying, Cheating Bastard

Posted by Delaine - January 26, 2010 - Escaping: Books, Music, Films, Grief/ Anger, Infidelity, Surviving
revenge cheating spouse  Serving It Up Cold To That Lying, Cheating Bastard

When you found out your spouse was cheating, were you obsessed with thoughts of revenge?  Throwing all his clothes in a heap on the lawn…slashing his tires…or forwarding copies of his cyber sex sessions to his entire address book?   Maybe your fantasies were more devious – perhaps they involved some Superglue and the bathroom throne.  Or maybe…

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Can Infidelity Save The Modern Marriage?

Posted by Delaine - November 12, 2009 - Dating & Sex, Infidelity, Making It Work, Relationships
affair spouse cheating  Can Infidelity Save The Modern Marriage?

Can cheating on your spouse end up saving your marriage? According to Noel Biderman in his new book, Cheaters Proper, How Infidelity Will Save The Modern Marriage, the answer, believe it or not, is yes. Who is this Noel Biderman?  This native Torontonian is the CEO and founder of  The Ashley Madison Agency, an online dating…

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Getting Real: If You’re Secretly ‘Talking’ to Someone, Are You Cheating On Your Spouse?

Posted by Delaine - July 16, 2009 - Infidelity, Surviving
emotional affair11  Getting Real:  If You’re Secretly ‘Talking’ to Someone, Are You Cheating On Your Spouse?

Though there may be some exceptions to the rule, in my opinion, ’emotional affairs’ are the same, if not worse, than jumping in bed with someone else.  I’ve heard many justifications from people:  “But it’s not really cheating cause I haven’t had sex with her. ”  Or:  “We just have this connection, you know.  I can’t expect my…

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An Uncomfortable Reality: Secrets, Lies & Hidden Desires Are Everywhere

Posted by Delaine - May 11, 2009 - Healing, Infidelity, Social Barriers & Change, Surviving, Wisdom Gained
married divorced woman affa1  An Uncomfortable Reality: Secrets, Lies & Hidden Desires Are Everywhere

It happened while waiting for my son’s school performance to begin. I was sitting in a packed school auditorium amongst row after row of seemingly devoted parents.     I watched couples sitting side-by-side, some not talking, some holding hands, and the odd mom or dad sitting solo.  Suddenly, the questions began floating through my…

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The Internet – A Quick Way for Wives & Husbands to Cheat

Posted by Delaine - March 22, 2009 - Dating & Sex, Infidelity, Internet Dating, Social Barriers & Change
cheating spouse wife sex1  The Internet – A Quick Way for Wives & Husbands to Cheat

Good Morning America recently featured a report on cheating wives.  And two things about this news-clip stood out for me:  one, how society still ‘gasps’ when its women who are choosing to have affairs.  And two, how the internet is making cheating so easy.  According to adultery expert, Bonnie Weil, an estimated 50-62% of married women cheat.  And admittedly, I…

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Cheating Husband in the Public Swimming Pool

Posted by Delaine - February 28, 2009 - Infidelity
cheating husband divorce1  Cheating Husband in the Public Swimming Pool

I was at a public swimming pool with my three kids, playing in the toddler section.  A great big bucket of water above us was almost full and teetering to tip.  My kids squealed and we all huddled in, arms entwined, heads down…till finally, the much-anticipated water crashed over our heads and backs. Laughing, I scooted back…

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Cheating Spouse: Should You Get REVENGE?

Posted by Delaine - January 15, 2009 - Grief/ Anger, Infidelity, Surviving
angry woman small  Cheating Spouse: Should You Get REVENGE?

Keying his car doors.  Burning his clothes.  Emptying his bank account.  Posting photos/ love letters of his affair all over the internet.  Telling his boss and all his friends…   We’ve all heard the expression “Hell hath no fury like a woman’s scorn.”   Infidelity is one sure way to bring it on.  Betrayal hurts like hell.

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