Category: Advice

Dating Advice: You Are Not Your Story

Posted by Delaine - May 27, 2014 - Advice, Concerns & Fears, Dating & Sex, Healing, Wisdom Gained
story  Dating Advice: You Are Not Your Story

FROM THE ARCHIVES MAY 2009 A divorced girlfriend of mine was going out on a date – a third date, which rarely happened with her. And as we talked over the phone beforehand, she was almost panicked.“I actually like this man, Delaine. But the timing couldn’t be worse – my life is such a mess, […]

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What's It REALLY Like to Have An Affair?

Posted by Delaine - April 11, 2014 - Advice, Grief/ Anger, Infidelity, Phases/ Stages, Relationships, Surviving
dating separated men problems challenges how to1 300x200  What

It was my deepest, darkest secret – something that nourished me, tortured me, yet ultimately tore my family apart:  After seven years of marriage, the birth of three kids, and weathering the emotional storm of my husband’s infidelity, I made the choice to have an affair. Now I’m not revealing this today as some kind of […]

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Colored Blue this Valentine’s Day Season: What to do with Sadness?

Posted by Delaine - January 22, 2012 - Advice, Grief/ Anger, Healing, slideshow, Wisdom Gained
blues valentines day sadness divorce breakup3 300x253  Colored Blue this Valentine’s Day Season: What to do with Sadness?

This Valentine’s Day season is turning out to be a tough one for many of my readers.  Letters are steadily trickling in, speaking of break-ups, heart-ache, sadness, and overwhelm. Everyone is looking for reprieve – to break free of the pain, to feel their smile,  at the very least, to hold onto hope.   I offer up ’tips’ to some readers, suggestions on […]

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Coping Tips To Get Through Valentine’s Day

Posted by Delaine - January 15, 2012 - Advice, Grief/ Anger, Healing, Surviving
default  Coping Tips To Get Through Valentine’s Day

I have been through four Valentine’s Days since I got divorced.  And I’ve been all over the map emotionally: sad.  Indifferent.  Self-pitying.  Grumpy (read this from the archives!).  At other times however, I was happy and excited, as I learned to cope with this season of love and romance in new and different ways. Thus […]

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Happy or Hurting? The Face Men Wear During Divorce

Posted by Delaine - May 23, 2011 - Advice, Grief/ Anger, Healing, Surviving
divorcing man help sad angry trying to move on  Happy or Hurting?  The Face Men Wear During Divorce

Men and women are wired differently. They communicate differently, they process information differently, they cope with stress differently AND – they process feelings of grief differently, including those that stem from divorce. On the heels of last week’s video where I explored how women commonly cope with their feelings of loss after divorce, this week I’m […]

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Midlife divorce: Blame it on your parents?

Posted by Delaine - January 15, 2011 - Advice, Healing, Midlife Divorce
midlife divorce blame parents  Midlife divorce: Blame it on your parents?

Contributed by Deborah Moskovitch . Shannon*, a 48 year old client of mine, recently explained her “aha” moment when discussing the issues behind her impending divorce.  She married her husband because he “completed” her – masking low self-esteem and feelings of not being worthy of love.  It wasn’t until after therapy and introspection that she realized […]

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Resentment: Molten Lava In One’s Bones

Posted by Delaine - December 1, 2010 - Advice, Grief/ Anger, Healing, Surviving
resentment molten lava 300x197  Resentment: Molten Lava In One’s Bones

At three and a half years into my divorce, I no longer feel like I’m mourning my marriage.  The grief, the fear, the heartache of betrayal  - they lie behind me now, serving as sources of strength and wisdom, not pain.  But getting over my marriage is one thing, getting over my ex’s behavior during our divorce is another.  […]

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To Change Or Not To Change The LOCKS After Separating

Posted by Delaine - February 3, 2010 - Advice, Dealing with the ex, On being alone, Support & Girlfriends, Surviving
change locks door divorce 150x150  To Change Or Not To Change The LOCKS After Separating

Two months into his divorce, Mike returned home early from work one afternoon to a big surprise:  his ex-wife had let herself in and was standing in his living room.   “I needed to come by and pick up a few things,” she said casually.  “I tried calling you earlier.  Didn’t you get my message?  I didn’t think you’d mind…” […]

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