Stop After The First-Date Kiss – Yeah, RIGHT
Hollywood TV and film make it look so easy: at the closure of a first date, a man and woman stand facing each other on her porch. Both are intensely attracted to one another. Chins tilt, lips touch… and for a long, blissful moment, they yield to the passion of their first kiss.
But - hands never venture anywhere inappropriate. Lips inevitably unlock. And then what do they do?
They go home. Separately.
Pfft. Yeah right.
There’s no doubt in MY mind that ‘parting’ is a lot more difficult in real life. Cause a lovely gentle kiss usually becomes deep kissing; deep kissing leads to hands roaming; hands roaming lead to hips pressing; and HELLO! Who the hell wants to separate and go home then????
As a divorced woman who doesn’t have an active sex life (*sigh, blame it on bad luck) - and hasn’t for a looooong time, I’ll honestly admit that if a man dared kiss me right now, and I was more than half-way into him (and he was a good kisser), clothes would be flying off within minutes. I wouldn’t have the desire or will power to show restraint. Nothing short of the roof collapsing would stop me.
I know my admission is very unromantic. I sound impatient, reckless, possibly even cave woman’ish. But if I polled a group of divorced men and women, I bet more numbers would tilt to the carnal side that the virtuous. Stopping after a passionate kiss looks good and all in the movies, but it’s what you do when you’re, say, 15 years old. But to write the same script for a fully grown adult? One who knows how good sex feels, who went from steady stream of sex to nada, and who’s hormones are verging on a meltdown? C’mon! It’s a hell of a lot easier said than done!
I see only two possible ways out of this first-date-becomes-first-sex situation – assuming this is a situation anyone wants to avoid. First, one of the parties involved has to ‘control the show’ so to speak, and be strong enough to walk away. A man has never done that to me before…but, if one were to, I know I’d honor it (though potentially go mad till I see him again).
The other option is to avoid first date kisses altogether – a handshake or hug will do. I personally like the sound of the latter:I think it’s easier to refrain from everything, than to have to shut things down mid-atomic explosion.
I’m just calling the situation as I see it here. folks. It’s not romantic. It’s not pretty. But it’s darn well honest and worth a ponder. What do YOU think?