The Sex Was Forgettable but Their Nicknames Went Down in History

K, I mean no disrespect towards men in writing today’s article.  Truly – cross-my-heart -  I love you men and I adore almost everything about you.

But sometimes, gosh darnit, us grown women have to have a laugh at your expense.

Case in point, this past weekend at lunch with two of my gfs.   I was full-on absorbed, trying to making a point  around dating, when my mind reached into my dating memory bank for a personal example – a guy’s name -

…and without even thinking, without even so much as a pause, instead of calling this guy by his real name, out came “Fat Charlie Sheen” and then I kept going.

And my girlfriends howled.

I honestly meant no disrespect. Of course I don’t think of men but as nicknames.  But I’d only dated him a couple of times.  It was months ago.   He hadn’t made that strong an impression on me.  But what DID make a strong impression on me was when my drunk gf had first met him and slurred: “Man, he looks like a fat Charlie Sheen.”  So it stuck. : )

Whenever us girls get together, other ‘nicknames’ often come into the mix: “Yummy Stranger”, “Football Coach Chad”, “Jon the Dom”,  “The Duke.”  And yes, my dear reader, all these names belong to men I, and I alone, once dated.

But in my defense, I’m blaming it on having written my memoir.  These were men I dated – and wrote about – during the first year after my divorce.   And to protect people’s identities, I changed (and had fun with) the names.  And all I can say is that when you write about someone and then rewrite that name over and over and over again,the nickname sticks!!!

I dunno.  At the end of the day, I think what’s important in dating after divorce isn’t so much the accurate oral recitation of first names so much as the LESSONS one learned.  And when I’m sitting across from a friend who’s fresh divorcing, I’m confidant “Yummy Stranger” drills home a message much stronger than “Bob.”  Don’t you think?