What’s Wrong with your Online Dating Profile?

Posted by Delaine - February 22, 2011 - Dating & Sex, Internet Dating - No Comments

Have you ever shown your online dating profile to a friend?  Get any solid feedback?  Cause the truth is, writing a successful online dating profile can be a lot harder than one suspects.  Worse still, you can unknowingly be turning off the opposite sex!

Take my client Nancy as an example.  Late thirties, divorced with no kids, she approached me last week asking me to critique her profile.  She said that after eight months of being online, she was only attracting men who were “uneducated, uninteresting, and unattractive. ” (her words)  Immediately I got to work:

Her photo gallery couldn’t have been better – very flattering shots showing her in range of poses and wearing different attire.  Her main picture was a head shot – big smile, lovely complexion – truly, a very beautiful woman.

But once I finished reading her written profile, I was actually wincing.  Of the four paragraphs she’d written (in very good English), three of them focused on what she wanted in a man.  Only one line actually provided a description of HER and her interests, which was quickly followed by  “Looking for a man who’s interested in the same.”

Ladies AND gentlemen readers, you must remember that long lists of what you seek in a partner will not only intimidate some prospects, but depict you as high maintenance, negative or difficult to please.  I ‘get’ that you might be sick and tired of being approached by ‘losers’.  But amplifying your ‘list’ is not going to make ‘those ones’ go away (they’re the most persistent breed).  What it WILL do, however, is turn off the ‘good catches’ who view your profile and never write to you – you know, like the ones who have their profiles hidden.  You can’t tell me that of the millions of people online, there’s not ONE good catch for you (like Nancy tried to argue).  Chances are, good ones ARE looking reading your profile…and passing you over.

So remember, if you’re not getting the results you want from internet dating, you should probably take a close look at your profile.  Get a good friend to, as well.  One who will be honest.  And preferably one of the opposite sex.  And if you need a professional eye to either create, rewrite or critique what you have,  drop me a message at delaine (at) I am divorced not dead (dot) com.

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