Valentine’s Day Grump
(A Divorced Reader’s ‘FIRST’ Valentine’s Day after divorce)
I admit it. This Valentine’s Day thing has me rolling my eyes. I don’t want to say it aloud to all my happily married and in-love friends. But all the dreamy romanticism of this holiday makes me want to …well…spew.
I know it’s cause I’m not ready for a relationship. I know it’s cause ‘true love’ is defined to me right now through my relationships with me, my kids and my friends. And I also know it’s cause I’d rather have a man stare into my eyes as he’s tying me up, rather than as he whispers sweet I love you’s.
I can’t help but laugh at my attitude towards Valentine’s Day. It really doesn’t bother me. I figure it’s all just parr for where I’m at on the divorce course. Past Valentine’s Days have been all over the map for me – some fabulous, some dreamy, some heartbreaking, and some alone. At the end of the day, it’s really just a day. So I’m not giving it any more meaning than that; it’s my choice.
I just wish that advertisers would expand their commercial messaging and paraphernalia around Valentine’s Day. Since millions of us are divorced, can they not talk about love more broadly? I mean, ENOUGH with the smooching couples in a heart. ENOUGH with love-sick faces that glow from Cupid’s Golden arrows. Show me a picture of Cupid dipping his arrow in arsenic and doing a bull’s eye in my ex’s forehead, and then maybe I’ll actually want to buy something.
Yeah – I’m a Valentine’s Day grump *grin.
4 comments
Ha! Great images there.
Well, lots of sista love from me girlfriend!
Mwah!
I’m a grump too, however I think my reasons are a bit different. I’m actually envious of all the couples in love out there. My STBX didn’t do squat for me during our marriage, and less after the kids were born. I don’t think I even got a card for any of the major holidays from him for years. I don’t necessarily want to BE part of a couple right now, but it would feel great to be appreciated for who I am and what we have shared (physical, spiritual, emotional, whatever).
I say bah Valentine’s Day too. But at least it’s an excuse to buy and stuff myself with cholcate!
I think it’s important to be where you’re at and own your feelings, plain and simple. ‘Pretending’ can rob of us so much energy! I think many women and men feel the same way you do, they just don’t come right out and say it – so thanks for being honest – and the dash of humor!