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"Friends With Benefits" – A Myth, A Rarity, or A Matter of Luck?

Posted by Delaine - May 18, 2015 - Dating & Sex, From the Dating Trenches
friends with benefits  "Friends With Benefits" – A Myth, A Rarity, or A Matter of Luck?

From Year Two Post-Divorce When my best friend Hali and I found ourselves newly separated and back out in the dating trenches, we kept hearing the term “Friends With Benefits.”   We both liked the sound of it and decided it was something we wanted.  After all, we weren’t ready for serious, but we wanted to have sex.  Thus a sexual…

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The Heart and Soul of Dominance & Submission

Posted by Delaine - April 30, 2015 - Fears & Challenges, Loving & Trusting, Making It Work, Relationships, Sex
ayhan 13 300x298  The Heart and Soul of Dominance & Submission

I accidentally crossed paths with my first Dominant online when I was going through a divorce seven years ago. My first thought was to run away fast: He must be some whip-toting freak with a dungeon in his basement. Fast-forward to today and I have three Dominant/submissive (D/s) relationships behind me (though I’ve had vanilla…

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What's It REALLY Like to Have An Affair?

Posted by Delaine - April 11, 2015 - Advice, Grief/ Anger, Infidelity, Phases/ Stages, Relationships, Surviving
dating separated men problems challenges how to1 300x200  What

It was my deepest, darkest secret – something that nourished me, tortured me, yet ultimately tore my family apart:  After seven years of marriage, the birth of three kids, and weathering the emotional storm of my husband’s infidelity, I made the choice to have an affair. Now I’m not revealing this today as some kind of…

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Travelling Spouse: Prevent Your Relationship & Home-Life From Nose-Diving

Posted by Delaine - March 31, 2015 - Fears & Challenges, Making It Work, Relationships
travel 1 300x173  Travelling Spouse: Prevent Your Relationship & Home-Life From Nose-Diving

When a spouse regularly works out of town, return trips home usually spell stress and chaos on the home front.  Over time, resentment can easily grow around issues like downtime, chores, parenting and (lack of) sex.  Here are some tips and insights to keep your relationship on track. Downtime: Respect that you both need it…

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I Made Out With A Married Man, and I Told His Wife (Part II)

Posted by Delaine - February 25, 2015 - Dating & Sex, From the Dating Trenches
delaine moore cheating husbands calgary stampede 300x222  I Made Out With A Married Man, and I Told His Wife (Part II)

From year four post-divorce So as the countdown begins to this year’s Calgary Stampede, I’m reminded of last year’s “debacle” during the festivities. That is, I spent eight hours at a bar with a handsome “urban cowboy” who professed to be single and genuinely smitten by me. A day later, I found out that he…

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The Grand SLAM: *Sex *Like *A *Man

Posted by Delaine - January 31, 2015 - Concerns & Fears, Cougars & Single Moms, Dating & Sex, Sexual Issues & Kinks, Women's Sexuality
dominant 2 300x173  The Grand SLAM: *Sex *Like *A *Man

You’ve probably heard women refer to it – this concept of having sex like a man.  But what exactly does that mean?  Why is it challenging for women to do?  Yet why are more women doing it? Leaving judgements aside, let’s take a closer look: Meaning of SLAM: Some women think that having sex like…

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Hello God? It’s Me, Delaine. Can You PLEASE Somehow End This Date?

Posted by Delaine - January 20, 2015 - Dating & Sex, From the Dating Trenches
bad date get me out of here  Hello God? It’s Me, Delaine. Can You PLEASE Somehow End This Date?

FROM THE ARCHIVES: Year four post-divorce His comments caught me totally off guard: We were out on our second date – me and this handsome, charming, 42-year-old divorced businessman. The Indian food we’d eaten was excellent, as was the conversation we’d shared: satisfying…delicious…with just enough ’spice.’  And as we sat there finishing up the last drops of our red wine, I…

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Looking Back: “The Duke” Was A Donkey’s Ass

Posted by Delaine - December 12, 2014 - Dating & Sex, From the Dating Trenches
donkey ass dominant the duke  Looking Back: “The Duke” Was A Donkey’s Ass

Seven years have now passed since I went through the insanity of my divorce.  I’m in a COMPLETELY different place in my life in all respects.  And when I think back on “The Duke” — the online, self-proclaimed “Dominant” who had a pronounced voice in my memoir, The Secret Sex Life of a Single Mom. my most prominent…

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The Many Degrees of ‘Man Craziness': Is It time to Break the Habit?

Posted by Delaine - November 3, 2014 - Concerns & Fears, Dating & Sex, Longing...and Learning, Phases/ Stages
divorced woman man crazy obsessed delaine moore dating  The Many Degrees of ‘Man Craziness

A lot of divorced women – myself included – go through a ‘man crazy’ phase in the aftermath of divorce. By ‘man-crazy’ I mean some part of them is always thinking about, worried about, or eagerly daydreaming about some guy they plan to meet, want to meet, or hope to meet. There are many different…

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7 Alternatives to Divorce

Posted by Delaine - October 31, 2014 - Deciding to Stay or Go
133539422 1024x683  7 Alternatives to Divorce

No, divorce is not your only option.  I tell this to my clients over and over.  Numerous alternatives are available to you, and how they’re structured depends on how flexible you are as a couple are, as well as how great your desire is to be together.  They’re definitely worth considering before resorting to divorce. Separate…

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Dating Advice: You Are Not Your Story

Posted by Delaine - May 27, 2014 - Advice, Concerns & Fears, Dating & Sex, Healing, Wisdom Gained
story  Dating Advice: You Are Not Your Story

FROM THE ARCHIVES MAY 2009 A divorced girlfriend of mine was going out on a date – a third date, which rarely happened with her. And as we talked over the phone beforehand, she was almost panicked.“I actually like this man, Delaine. But the timing couldn’t be worse – my life is such a mess,…

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Talking Dating & Sex After Divorce on CTV's The Social

Posted by Delaine - April 3, 2014 - Between the Sheets, Concerns & Fears, Cougars & Single Moms, Dating & Sex, Internet Dating, Longing...and Learning, Women's Sexuality
dee and gals from The Social  Talking Dating & Sex After Divorce on CTV

I had the amazing opportunity on April 2 to go on CTV’s daytime talk show, The Social, to talk about the challenging world of dating and sex after divorce. I can’t embed it yet here, cause it’s not yet uploaded to YouTube. But at the very least, I want to provide you with the link…

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Loving Again After Divorce: I Admit It – I’m Afraid

Posted by Delaine - March 25, 2014 - Dating & Sex, Fears & Challenges, Healing, Longing...and Learning, Loving & Trusting, Phases/ Stages, Relationships
divorce fear of love1  Loving Again After Divorce: I Admit It – I’m Afraid

From year two post-divorce… A close male friend of mine, one whose opinion I value greatly, keeps telling me:  Gypsy (his nickname for me), you are so afraid to fall in love.  You’ve built walls to protect yourself and keep men out, but you must be careful not to become your own prisoner. Immediately I…

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The Cheater & His Self-Loathing

Posted by Delaine - March 22, 2014 - Healing, Infidelity, Surviving, Wisdom Gained
cheating man self hate loathing  The Cheater & His Self-Loathing

FROM THE ARCHIVES 2009 You my not see it.   But it’s there… deep within him. It is beyond his admission, beyond his self-awareness. But it’s there,  eating away at his soul… His self-loathing. He may seem all blissfully happy-in-love with her; look at that skip in his step. That skips says that he wants nothing…

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Thoughts on the “Next Serious Relationship” After Divorce

Posted by Delaine - January 10, 2014 - Blended & Changing Families, Fears & Challenges, Loving & Trusting, Making It Work, Relationships
serious relationship after divorce 300x153  Thoughts on the “Next Serious Relationship” After Divorce

The title of this blog may be a bit misleading.  Cause I don’t want to talk in a professional  tone or way about the “next serious relationship” after divorce.  I want to talk about mine. That’s right.  MY next serious relationship.  I had one for over 20 months.  And I never told you anything about…

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Not Just A ‘Divorcee': I’m a Magnficient Women with A Past

Posted by Delaine - December 23, 2013 - Healing, On being alone, Strong Mind & Spirit, Wisdom Gained
000d60aa06df0972913a4e 278x300  Not Just A ‘Divorcee

FROM THE ARCHIVES 2011 There is a feeling under my skin – one that has risen to the surface over the past few years since my divorce. It tells of love, despair, renewal, and adventure. It comes from marrying, birthing, falling, bleeding, daring, reaching and celebrating. It’s a story – a hard-earned one – that is me, but not all of me:…

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When Men Quickly “Replace” After Separation or Divorce

Posted by Delaine - September 11, 2013 - Dealing with the ex, Fears & Challenges, Grief/ Anger, Loving & Trusting, Relationships, Surviving, Understanding Men/Women
men replace quickly after divorce  When Men Quickly “Replace” After Separation or Divorce

When Barb contacted me via email last week, she was clearly very upset.  Only six months into her divorce, she’d discovered that her separated husband had a new serious girlfriend; they were even making plans to move in together.  “It’s not that I want him back,” she wrote.  “But it’s such a slap in the face –…

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Financial Domination: An Unusual Fetish on the Fringes of BDSM

Posted by Delaine - August 30, 2013 - Dating & Sex, From the Dating Trenches, Sexual Issues & Kinks
financial domination fetish Ds dating after divorce 300x274  Financial Domination: An Unusual Fetish on the Fringes of BDSM

My girlfriend Deanne was messaging a younger man from a dating website this week, when out of the blue, he hit her with an “unusual” request: “Every month I’d like to give you money,“ he wrote.  “You can spend it on yourself or any way you want.  We can start out with small sums but maybe eventually get…

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Qualities To Look For In A REAL Dominant

Posted by Delaine - May 31, 2013 - Concerns & Fears, Dating & Sex, Internet Dating, Sexual Issues & Kinks
dominant signs qualities characteristics 223x300  Qualities To Look For In A REAL Dominant

Many women are actively seeking a Dominant in their private lives as a result of having read Fifty Shades of Grey or The Secret Sex Life of a Single Mom.   But ladies, beware:  ANY man can sport black leather and  a flogger and call himself a Dom.  You need to know how to distinguish the…

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8 Flashing Warning Signs: Dating The Separated Man

Posted by Delaine - April 30, 2013 - Concerns & Fears, Cougars & Single Moms, Dating & Sex, Phases/ Stages, Understanding Men/Women
mars venus alien2  8 Flashing Warning Signs: Dating The Separated Man

He says his marriage is long over.  He says he’s ready to date again.  But would it be wise for you – a woman who is ultimately seeking a serious relationship – to throw caution to the wind and dive right in? I’d definitely say, “No way.” Getting involved with a separated man usually comes…

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